She'll Be Back

Haunting Obama’s Dreams
By MAUREEN DOWD
Published: March 23, 2008

Maureen Dowd is still having nightmares about Hillary Clinton’s resurgent campaign even though most pundits don’t see any chance of the Senator from New York catching the Senator from Illinois in either the delegate count or the popular vote. Still Dowd claims that people are worried.

It is a tribute to Hillary Clinton that even though, rationally, political soothsayers think she can no longer win, irrationally, they wonder how she will pull it off.

In her nightmare scenario, an undead Hillary arises like a killing machine to menace the hero:

It’s impossible to imagine The Terminator, as a former aide calls her, giving up. Unless every circuit is out, she’ll regenerate enough to claw her way out of the grave, crawl through the Rezko Memorial Lawn and up Obama’s wall, hurl her torso into the house and brutally haunt his dreams.

“It’s like one of those movies where you think you know the end, but then you watch with your fingers over your eyes,” said one leading Democrat.

This monster movie analogy was used here on the Dowd Report as well as by Dowd’s fellow Obamamaniac Andrew Sullivan. Here is his take:

The Oscars host Jon Stewart compares [the Clintons] to a Terminator: the kind that is splattered into a million tiny droplets of vaporised metal . . . only to pool together spontaneously and charge back at you unfazed.

Of course, comparing Hillary to a ruthless killing machine is not a new concept. This video is one of several on YouTube.

But Dowd saves some of her venom of the other half of the Clinton tag-team. In perhaps the cheapest shot ever leveled at Bill Clinton, Maureen has this to say about his latest campaign spinning:

On Friday in Charlotte, N.C., Bill Clinton, the man who once thanked an R.O.T.C. recruiter “for saving me from the draft” during Vietnam, sounded like Sean Hannity without the finesse.

Ouch.

Conventional wisdom has it that Hillary’s last hope is some sort of power play involving the super delegates that she has courted. This sort of logrolling is supposed to be the Clintons strong point, but Dowd throws a bucket of water on this wicked witch.

After the Hillary camp lost — and trashed — Bill Richardson and was outmaneuvered by the Obama forces on mulligans in Michigan and Florida, Hillary’s hopes dwindled down to the superdelegates.

If Jimmy Carter, Al Gore and Nancy Pelosi are the dealmakers, it won’t take Hercule Poirot to figure out who had knives out for Hillary in this “Murder on the Orient Express.”

Movies With Maureen® Spoiler Alert: In the star-studded Agatha Christie classic, the murder victim was so hated that everyone on the train had a motive for killing him and they did.

Dowd then lists the beefs each of these party bigwigs has with the ham-handed Clintons and comes to this conclusion:

If Hillary’s fate falls into the hands of Jimmy, Al and Nancy, the Clinton chickens may come home to roost.

And that would be a movie as scary as The Birds.